Almost Haiti . . . West Virginia

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Bethesda

Trad climber
Bethesda
Topic Author's Original Post - Jan 14, 2018 - 11:47am PT
The tourism motto for West Virginia used to be Almost Heaven . . . West Virginia. When I started climbing some Washington D.C. climbers argued that the motto should be Almost Haiti . . . West Virginia.

I thought that was grossly unfair until a local at the New poked a gun in my face because he thought I was trespassing on his land (I wasn't).

The motto is now Wild and Wonderful West Virginia.
Bethesda

Trad climber
Bethesda
Topic Author's Reply - Jan 14, 2018 - 12:30pm PT
When my mother was researching her Swedish ancestors, she found out that some of them were Sami. Remember the Sami girlfriend in Lilyhammer and her reindeer-herding relatives? Anyway, some of our (putatively) non-Sami Swedish relatives were deeply upset and said that the research could not possibly be true. Our family has never had anything like that. In other words, fake news...

So I doubt whether we should admit those Sami-hating Scandinavian bigots to our union.

By the way, if you were wondering what a Sami looks like, I believe Renee Zellweger is at least part Sami.

Bethesda

Trad climber
Bethesda
Topic Author's Reply - Jan 14, 2018 - 12:42pm PT
What I meant to say, BJ, is that in 1948 and before, the Norwegian population may have been white but it wasn't uniform. There was the germanic-descended majority and there were the Sami, who were not of germanic descent and who were in some sense indigenous. The treatment of the Sami population by the Norwegian and Swedish governments has parallels to the United States treatment of Native Americans -- attempted eradication of the language, forced education of the young in the majority culture, etc.
Sierra Ledge Rat

Mountain climber
Old and Broken Down in Appalachia
Jan 14, 2018 - 02:57pm PT
I have been living in West-by-God-Virginia for more than 15 years. Married a local girl. My friend call the state West Pennsyltucky.

The state is quite diverse. The southern part of the state is where most of the coal fields are located. Unemployment is very high, as is heroin addiction. The people there are very poor and very, very dumb. The #1 career aspiration down there is to get on disability and collect a government check for the rest of their lives. It's classic Trump country.

The northern part of the state reminds me of Northern California in the 1970s. It's where I live. Very liberal. Lots of hippies and money.

The thumb of WV is more like Virginia and has a lot of the Washington DC crowd.

WV is an outdoor paradise. The skiing isn't so good, but the rock-climbing, whitewater kayaking, and caving are world class. The cost of living is very reasonable. I make more money here than I would in California, and I live in a much bigger house than I could ever afford out west. Crime is quite low. These are the reason that I moved here.

But I do grow tired of dealing with all of the stupid Trump rednecks.

wilbeer

Mountain climber
Terence Wilson greeneck alleghenys,ny,
Jan 14, 2018 - 03:01pm PT
Agreed, I have family there that fought against each other in the civil war.

Please tell me what’s so good about Merryland,er , Baltimore,really.
Send

Trad climber
Central Sierra
Jan 14, 2018 - 03:18pm PT
Probably making shine, meth, growing weed or he was sick and tired of folks poaching ginseng or making shine on his land.

What happened?

Bethesda

Trad climber
Bethesda
Topic Author's Reply - Jan 14, 2018 - 03:35pm PT
It turns out he was notorious for pointing his gun at climbers. He had a long-standing dispute with the government -- I don't remember whether state or federal -- as to where the boundaries of his land were. Or perhaps part of his land had been taken by eminent domain for building a road. I am not sure of the details. Anyway, he was still convinced it was his land even though everybody else thought it was not. I apologized and went back the way I came.

I understood his point but wished he could have found another way of making it.
Sierra Ledge Rat

Mountain climber
Old and Broken Down in Appalachia
Jan 14, 2018 - 09:17pm PT
Apologies to Sierra Ledge Rat, I was being facetious
No apologies necessary! WV is a bit of shithole, but you gotta find your corner of paradise. Yosemite is awesome, but driving through Modesto to get there???? EEEK!

WV is not so backwards. There's a new law - when a couple gets divorced they can still remain brother and sister.

WV has a new state family tree - the telephone pole.

The WV governor's mansion burned down and the governor died. But his wife will not go penniless - she gets his pension as soon as she turns 13.

I actually met a woman who married her brother. I asked her why she married her brother. Her answer (no lie):

I'm kinda shy, and I don't date, so when it came time to get married I thought that I should marry someone I already knew and loved. And besides, I already knew the sex was good.

Once I asked a 4 year old boy what he wanted to do when he grew up. His answer (no lie):

I wanna collect a welfare check just like daddy.

Of course, dad was 400 pounds and had a Trump ballcap.
Lituya

Mountain climber
Jan 14, 2018 - 10:15pm PT
The northern part of the state reminds me of Northern California in the 1970s. It's where I live. Very liberal. Lots of hippies and money.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_presidential_election_in_West_Virginia,_2016


Sierra Ledge Rat

Mountain climber
Old and Broken Down in Appalachia
Jan 14, 2018 - 10:26pm PT
The northern part of the state reminds me of Northern California in the 1970s. It's where I live. Relatively liberal compared to the rest of the state. More hippies and money than the rest of the state.

Fixed it

I live in Monongahela county, one of the two lightest pink counties in your first image

Logan, Mingo, and Wyoming (darkest red) are in the heart of the southern coal fields, and full of the dumbest people on the planet, i.e., Trump supporters.
Lituya

Mountain climber
Jan 14, 2018 - 10:37pm PT
Just flipping you sh#t. I guess the good people of WV were never rewarded for their Union participation post-1861. Ditto Kentucky. Northern snobbery?

Can't speak for WV, but try to remember that many (most) votes for Trump were anti-Hillary. Given the same two choices today, I'd still vote for him. The other choice was untenable.

Usually not a Wiki guy, but some great breakdowns of the 2016 election here. By state/county chart with links halfway down.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_presidential_election,_2016


FWIW, NorCal looks pretty pro-Trump too. Except Humbolt County.

skywalker1

Trad climber
co
Jan 14, 2018 - 11:16pm PT
Mountain mama...spent 5 years in Mo’town trying to juggle college and climbing and an unplanned whitewater fix. The place sucks! Please don’t move there! There is zero awesome deep water soloing, just slab climbing, even the backside, bouldering is non-exsistant, and the swimming holes are cold. The whitewater sucks too. If you find yourself there be sure to bring a North Jersey attitude and you’ll fit right in. ;-)

S.....

SLR: you squirt boat?
clinker

Trad climber
Santa Cruz, California
Jan 15, 2018 - 12:28am PT

Sharing jeans is southern hospitality.
Sierra Ledge Rat

Mountain climber
Old and Broken Down in Appalachia
Jan 15, 2018 - 01:14am PT
SLR: you squirt boat?
Is there anything else? I live near the infamous Jim Snyder, who taught me squirt boating. (Another reason I moved to WV). Jim and I went squirt boating together in Japan a couple of years ago.

[Click to View YouTube Video]



There is zero awesome deep water soloing, just slab climbing, even the backside, bouldering is non-exsistant, and the swimming holes are cold. The whitewater sucks too. If you find yourself there be sure to bring a North Jersey attitude and you’ll fit right in. ;-)

THAT'S RIGHT! This state sucks. Don't come here. STAY AWAY!
Bethesda

Trad climber
Bethesda
Topic Author's Reply - Jan 15, 2018 - 04:49am PT
Saw a guy in WVa flying a Confederate flag from his truck. He told me his family had always lived in WVa and that the flag was to honor his heritage. Seemed oblivious to what happened during the Civil War in WVa and how the state came into being.
EdwardT

Trad climber
Retired
Jan 15, 2018 - 09:13am PT
Did someone say West Virginia slogans?

"West Virginia: One Big Happy Family, Really!"

"West Virginia: Safe Sex, We Mark the Sheep that Kick"

"It's All Relative in West Virginia"

"West Virginia is for Loving Your Sister"

"West Virginia is Better If You're Drunk"

"West Virginia: Life is Full of Decisions ... Goat ... Sister ..."

"West Virginia: Now with Sckools"

Hey Bethesda, while we're talking about sh*tholes, how's life in Baltimore?
Bethesda

Trad climber
Bethesda
Topic Author's Reply - Jan 15, 2018 - 09:35am PT
Bethesda is actually a suburb of DC, and located to the northwest of DC, while Baltimore is to the northeast. DC is between me and Baltimore (I can see DC from my window). So you can ask me questions about DC if you want, although the part nearest to me, northwest DC, also known as Ward 3, is pretty boring.
Mighty Hiker

climber
Outside the Asylum
Jan 15, 2018 - 10:04am PT
Bethesda is a village in North Wales.

And Royal Robbins came from West Virginia.
Bethesda

Trad climber
Bethesda
Topic Author's Reply - Jan 15, 2018 - 10:28am PT
I can give you one shithole story about DC.

There is a wealthy neighborhood (3 m $ houses) near American University named Spring Valley. A hundred years ago the area was undeveloped farmland. The U.S. Army used American University to develop chemical weapons during WWI and when the war was over someone decided to dispose of extra gas weapons by digging a trench near American University and dumping the weapons in. Everyone forgot about the trench and the area was eventually developed with expensive houses. Sometime in the 80s or 90s the gas canisters started leaking and people in the neighborhood started getting sick. The issue was eventually discovered and U.S. Army assumed responsibility for remediation. For the last twenty years, U.S. Army engineers have been removing soil and in some cases houses. There is still a gas alarm system in place; when I ride my bike through the neighborhood, I see a sign saying, if the siren goes off, shelter in place, do not go outdoors. As recently as a month ago, workers at one of the sights were taken to the hospital for suspected gas exposure.

I don't know what remedies homeowners in the area had for loss of property value. U.S. Army did buy the most severely affected houses.
Steve Grossman

Trad climber
Seattle, WA
Jan 15, 2018 - 01:18pm PT
Misty taste of moonshine, teardrop in my eye...

The New is freakin' stellar climbing and gorgeous...scuz the pun. Think Endless Wall.............................................................................................$$$
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